The Three Stages of Growth
We love some good family time watching a new show together. With only three of us in our home, it isn’t always as easy as you think to find something we all enjoy, but we agree on a few shows, including Cobra Kai. I struggle just to chill watching TV (anyone else? 🙋🏻♀️), so often I pick up my iPad and doodle in Procreate. It’s one of my favorite ways to decompress, allowing all the day to melt away with scribbles and nonsense. Maybe for you, it’s playing some Candy Crush or Solitaire. We all have our things.
Back to the couch. Mindlessly, I play with color palettes and different brushes. I work on my script lettering. Often it doesn’t amount to anything special except disharmonized colors and odd patterns that I hope no one will ever see.
Among my doodles, I drew a small flower growing out of a heart. I’ve doodled this before. Hearts and flowers are my favorite doodles. But this time with my doodle, in the most ordinary of moments, I had a new epiphany…
When the seedling emerges, it is rarely beautiful or glorious. Rather this budding plant is frail and delicate, even scrawny. It is now exposed to the elements and is no longer safe in its cocoon of dirt. The seed doesn’t choose to emerge or not. It just does. Now is the time for care, nourishment, and protection. What happens now is perhaps the most vital part for it to bloom into the glory of what God has called it to be.
Stage 1: In the Shell
We are meant for a season of staying in our shell. We need seasons of incubation, nourishment, and preparation. For a seed, the shell protects animals and unforgiving weather conditions. For us, our shell can protect us from embarrassing or shame-filled experiences. We may sustain this lifestyle for a time, but eventually, the time will come when we must either grow or die.
Personally, I have refused to break out of the safe shell I was wrapped in. At work, I would be too afraid to speak up with valuable input. I was in a bad marriage but would cover it all up with a smile to the world. I wanted to take risks but couldn’t bear the thought of failing.
I know what it’s like to hide from the world, protecting myself from any harm coming after me. Is this you today? Have you retreated into your shell?
Stage 2: Emerging
A former restaurant manager for a large, casual dining chain, and I worked my way up the ladder from being a server. I observed the managers. I knew all the procedures. When there would be a problem that would come up, I would ask all sorts of questions so that, one day, when I was finally a manager too, I would have all the answers. I didn’t think I could fail once I finally arrived.
For me, the most challenging situations always had to do with how to handle guest complaints. The nuances of reading each person and all the variables involved were challenging for me. I also knew it was either time for me to grow into this new position or time for this dream, idea, hope to die, and move on to something else.
Looking back over the years, I see the times I was in this same delicate stage, limboing between death and growth. I left this career eventually to go work for a small manufacturing company. I said yes to Bob high on infatuation. I started this blog to pursue my dream of writing. I said yes to moving 2,100 miles away from my deep roots because God made a clear path to Oregon. So many times when I said yes to growth rather than to death.
I know what it’s like to take a risk and step out from my protective space nervously. Have you emerged but still find yourself delicate and frail?
Stage 3: Blooming
Just because we emerge does not mean we will bloom. My marriage to Robert is the area most redeemed, and it is the most tangible expression I have of this concept. Our roots were shallow to start, only together for seven weeks before getting married. It would have been easy to have been in this young and frail marriage and to walk away. God cared for us when we refused to care for each other, and He became our shelter from the storms and traumas attacking us.
Now, we have bloomed, becoming a reflection of what God can do when He is glorified. We know we couldn’t have done this without someone else caring for us and tending to us. He took the seeds planted in us, the seeds He planted, and He nourished them.
What is your next step today?
The first step in taking action is often admitting right where we are. What stage do you find yourself in today? Are you being held there by God? Is fear holding you back? Is it time to take a risk? How can I pray for you in response to this? Could you shoot me an email and let me know? I read and respond to every email because you matter to me.
